I could eat deviled eggs like popcorn or chips. I can’t just have one. Please serve to me in a bucket or bag. Thank you.

I like them best when I don’t have to make the damned things. (Get it: devil…damned…… anyway.) They’re a pain imho. Mainly because of the time consuming process of peeling the eggs.

I’m convinced they’re called deviled eggs not because of the seasoning process developed in Russia in the 18th century (Google it); but because peeling eggs is probably the primary punishment given out to you in hell.

It’s not sitting on hot coals or hard labor. It’s standing, bent awkwardly over a sink with cold running water freezing your hands, while your thumbs get stabbed repeatedly by tiny shards of egg shells.

AND you can never quite get a good peel going. Nope; the shell always breaks off quickly and takes chunks of the egg with it. OH and that infuriating shell membrane….it constantly latches on to the egg white and you pick at it with your nails & rub it with your pruney fingers and little pieces come off; and when you think you finally have a good rhythm going…it sticks again.

As you near the end of one torturous eggsperience; you look behind you to see an entire bowl waiting to be peeled. It feels endless. I JUST WANT TO EAT THEM MAKE IT STOP! Yep that’s definitely on the list of fun things to do in hell.

Why am I posting this random rant on deviled eggs the day after Christmas?

Here’s your answer:

Peeled eggs so poorly it looks like you used a machete: NAILED IT!

Peeling eggs is the devil.